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Tag Archive for 'life change'

The Change Catalyst Quotation of the Week

Loneliness is the poverty of the self; solitude is the richness of self. - May Sarton

Transformation comes from facing your fears surrounding change and pushing through them. As they say, life can be lonely at the top. Instead of being lonely, take moments or projects where you are forced to be disciplined to reach a higher level of performance or awareness. No one can meditate for you. No one can control your eating or living habits. Face your fears and your dreams alone. Learn from them and share your learnings with the world.

Resistance to Change : Michael J Fox

Resistance to change is common. Sometimes this change is forced upon us due to a change in health. But as this interesting article on Michael J Fox reveals - even forced change does not always result in a change of behaviour. It took Fox almost 3 years before he admitted that he needed to be upfront and deal with his Parkinson’s disease.  Read more here at Success Magazine’s web site.

How can you become more creative? Try Improv!

A lot of people think they are either creative or not. My own experience of art class when I was in secondary school was not good. I labeled myself “uncreative” and kept myself in that box for many many years to come.

Only when I realised that creativity is defined in more than just artistic terms, did I fulfill my own creative potential.  I was able to become abundant with my unique talents. For me, abundance is the main purpose of creativity. How can we be more abundant?  Well by sharing our talents, experience and wisdom with the people around us for one. Another is to expand, grow and stretch our abilities! This is the hard part.

I enjoy stand-up comedy and spontaneous humour.  As a professional speaker and MC, I am known as very sharp in finding the humourous side of a situation. I enjoyed shows like Who’s line is it anyway? - a UK show on improvisational comedy that ran for 10 seasons in the UK and about 10 in the US.  The show format is based on a number of improvisational theater set pieces.  Add in competitive fun which was derived by Keith Johnstone (another Englishman) in the 1970s Theatresports.

I have hosted stand-up nights and guest improv troupes (Baby Wants Candy) over the last two years,  and enjoyed the shows tremendously. After thinking about hosting an improv night in Shanghai for a long time, I finally took the plunge.  I want to create a show that mixes local and international talent and offers opportunities to learn about the essentials of improv: acceptance and creativity.

After every rehearsal and show, I feel different. I see the funnier side of life - even in the crush of Shanghai traffic. I can riff off situations and turn them into more humourous outcomes. I feel more in the flow.  Improv can really help build up some powerful soft skills:  working with a team, listening, creative and strategic thinking and  the basic performance skills of voice, body gestures and character-playing.

We all know the expression “feel the fear and do it anyway”. Recently, I have become convinced that our greatest success lies in the things we run away from. Improv is a stretch, it can be scary but it really makes me feel more creative.

To see more about Improv China. See their Facebook group. Or web site.

What to do when you are stuck in a rut

Even the most successful people get stuck in a rut.  Your motivation and energy levels drop. You allow negative emotions to seep into your life. Your temper becomes shorter. You can’t see the point of life. And so on.

So what can you do to get out of your rut?

The key to making a change in your life is.. to make a change in your life. Break your routine. Take a new route to work in the morning. Travel on the subway or take a taxi if you usually drive.  Do something different. Take a walk after work instead of going to the bar. Take the family out to dinner if you usually eat at home. Buy your loved one a small gift. The purpose here is to break the routine, the monotony of your current routine which is not serving you.

Speed up or slow down.  If you are slipping into a depressed state of mind, you may notice that your energy levels drop. You watch TV more, you go to bed earlier and sleep longer. Speed things up. Take some exercise in the morning or after work. Have 15 minute bursts of activity around the house - perhaps clean up a pile of papers, sort through old magazines or clean the garage.

If you are feeling burned out, slow down. Spend 10 minutes each day in silence. Pray or meditate or simply think about your goals. Reduce your inputs. Turn your mobile phone to vibrate and turn off your computer’s email alert. Put your calls through to voice mail.  Insert these 10 minute breaks into your day until you feel calmer and more in control.

Start with your head. Dream about a wonderful place you would like to be now. Fill your mind with these beautiful images rather than negative emotions. Take out your year planner and pencil in a get-away week where you will be able to take a full break to recharge, rest and recover.  By creating this destination, you have made a roadmap for yourself and given yourself a way to get out of your current rut.

Getting stuck in a rut is only a temporary blip for a Change Catalyst.  Keep future and goal focused and progress- however small - will start to move you forward.  I am available to coach you through life’s obstacles. Contact me whenever you help out of your rut.

Book of the Week: The 4-Hour Work Week

4 Hour Work WeekOne of my own self-development targets for this year is to read a book a week. I have a big library of books which I haven’t completed (or started!) and I really want to tap into the wisdom inside them. I also just ordered 27 books from Amazon so I will have a full year of learning ahead. Can’t wait!  In “Book of the Week” I share with you the main points (as I see them) from one of these books.

I just sat down and went through Tim Ferriss’ great book on lifestyle design. Tim has an excellent blog here which I recommend you check out. Here is a summary of what I took-away from this reading:

Become a member of the NR (New Rich)

Don’t retire. Combine rest and work throughout life with mini-retirements. Relative income is more important than absolute income ($/hr). NR make USD5,000/hr. Focus on being productive instead of busy. Focus on your strengths not weaknesses. Use Definition – Elimination – Automation - Liberation. This is used to organise the content of the book.

Stressed?

Use eustress not distress to motivate you. Eustress is a term coined by Hans Selye, and defined in the model of Richard Lazarus (1974) as stress that is healthy or gives one a feeling of fulfillment or a feeling that you have done something great. (Source: wiki)

On setting goals
Doing the unrealistic is easier than doing the realistic. What would excite me? (rather than what are my goals?). Use Dreamlining (6 months and 12 months). Spreadsheets are included with the book and on Tim’s website.

On productivity
Time management out, elimination in. Increase personal productivity between 100 and 500%. Doing something unimportant well does not make it important. Use Parkinson’s Law: a task swells to fit the time given to it. Ask yourself three times a day “Am I being productive or just active?” The key to having more time is doing less. Define a short “to do list” and a “not to do” list. What would you do if you could only work 2 hours a day? 2 hours a week? Ask yourself:  “If this is the only thing I accomplish today, will I be satisfied with my day?” Batch common time consuming tasks together (emails, phone calls).

Low information diet
Stop watching TV, don’t read newspapers. (W: totally agree with this, haven’t had a TV since 2006). When reading ask “Will I definitely use this information for something immediate and important? Check email twice a day at 12pm and 4pm.

On automation
Build a system to replace yourself. Eliminate before you delegate. Use a VA (virtual assistant). Select on cost per completed task (not per hour). Use a VA firm rather than a solo operator. Never use a new-hire VA. Create new unique login and passwords for your VA. Hiring a VA (Ask for excellent English). Find a product or service “muse” to put your income on autopilot (W: Tim focuses mostly on products). Micro-test your products.

In conclusion, this book is a great refresher on lifestyle design. I especially like Tim’s idea of having goals that excite you. I took a look through my own list and to be honest - although many goals were worthy - they didn’t all excite. I went through the dreamlining process and came out with some more exciting goals.  Don’t let the book title put you off - it’s more of a challenge than an actual target. Start your journey to join the New Rich this year!

Are you still on track? Setting New Year’s resolutions that work

Keep on Track

It’s now 12 days into the new year. Are you still keeping your New Year’s resolutions? January is a month when gym memberships soar, new diets start and alcohol is abstained from after the blow-out holiday season. But how sustainable is this way of making life changes?

Perhaps not very. “New Year’s resolutions are a form of cultural procrastination,” says Dr. Timothy Pychyl, an associate professor of psychology at Carleton University who specializes in goal-setting and the study of procrastination. ”Every culture shares the circle of rebirth and concept of a possible self where you have an intention, but start in January. If you really want to do something, you can start anytime.” Dr. Pychyl’s term “possible self” can be thought of as the aspirations for yourself, your family and your life. Just what do you want to be, to do and to have.

If you are struggling to keep your new plans on track, read on.  We have four ways to help you keep your self improvement going well into 2009:

1. Are you ready for change?

Are you really ready for the change you want to make?  Change is a process not an event. Ask people who have tried to give up smoking several times before succeeding, it is easy to slip back into a habit that has been built up over many years. Even people who seem to have just quit or just started a new healthy habit have likely gone through a cycle of smaller changes before, even attitude changes.  I became a vegetarian in 2006 but had stopped eating seafood in 2004 after watching The Blue Planet BBC documentary which showed the damage deep sea fishing was doing to the ocean floor.  My change took a number of years and smaller shifts in attitude before it became a habit.  What smaller change or shift can you make towards your life change?   Find someone who is already living the change you want to make and ask them questions. I found a few vegetarian friends who reassured me that you could live healthily and energetically without meat. They were competing in endurance races and lived very active lives.

2. Are you targets realistic?

Once you are ready for the change, set yourself a target. Can you sustain it?  People who start exercise programs often start off very frequently - going daily or several times a week - only to get injured or taper the training off until old habits return.  While I like to have a huge “unrealistic” target to get me excited and motivated about a new sport, I still need to start with smaller steps. When I started thinking about competing in triathlons I wanted to race in the Ironman which is probably one of the toughest endurance races around. When I started talking to triathletes and learning about the sport from podcasts, I realised that you need at least three years solid training to build up to that race, which for an amateur would take around 12 - 16 hours to complete.  Realising this I shifted my attention to the shorter Olympic distance races which I finish in around 3 hours and are enjoyable.  I still have the intention to finish (at least one) Ironman race but I keep myself going with smaller targets.

3. Don’t make excuses for yourself

Are you good at finding “reasons” why you should not follow through on your intentions. Why you don’t need to get up (in the cold) and go for that jog, or why it’s perfectly fine to eat that lovely cheesecake. Dr. Pychyl says excuses reinforce the negative behaviour you desire to change. “We say, ‘No more cake,’ but we give in to feel good, then the “what the hell effect” takes hold, and you eat the whole cake.”  I have to admit I am a master of making these type of excuses - rationalising my actions so I still feel as though I am on track. At some point, we have to stop lying to ourselves!  I make a game to help. For example, when I realised over the summer as I was writing my book The One Minute Presenter, I was hammering the coffee and candy and was putting on some weight. Rather than try to give up them up, I turned it into a game.  I limited myself to a coffee in the morning and cut back the cake and candy to the weekend. I made a simple scoreboard so I could track my progress and after about a month my weight was back to normal. It was really fun to go to Jamaica Blue on a Saturday after five days without, I enjoyed it so much more! So stop making excuses for yourself, make the change a game.

4. Substitute rather than “give up”

Many New Year resolutions tend to be “give up” ones. Give up smoking, eating, drinking.  Instead of just quitting something, switch a positive action for it. So instead of not eating junk food, combine that with ‘ a visit to the gym/ swimming pool / park twice a week’.  Be sure to replace a negative addiction with a positive one - not another negative one. So if you quit smoking, don’t start eating five bars of chocolate a day.  Set yourself targets (daily / weekly / monthly) and measure them. Tick off the days on a piece of paper or chart. Make sure you keep the chart visible, paste it up in your bathroom or kitchen.

Most New Year’s Resolutions are history by February. I don’t want that to happen to you.  Contact me if you need any support with making your life changes a reality.

Read more about Dr. Pychyl here. You can also see similar articles on written goals here, getting started by making yourself a promise here, and some quick tips on getting focused here.  Good luck with our 2009 plans and goals!

Dos and Don’ts of Time Planning

Time block with a clock

At a recent meeting with a group of public speakers, I found out that the people most regarded by others as the most organised people (in terms of what they achieve) actually think of themselves as messy and undisciplined. Maybe those people have very high internal standards, but given the demands on our time and attention, we could all improve our time planning.

Indeed when people plan goals a calendar is not far away. As you are setting your new year goals and plans, how are you planning your time? As Benjamin Franklin once said - and I paraphrase - if you love life, don’t waste time because that is what life is made of.

So how do we find a balance and not “over-program” the first few weeks of the year with good intentions and forget about our goals by February. Especially as surveys have found most goals are forgotten by then. Here are a few suggestions:

Dos:

1. Focus on results (not activities)

Rather than saying you will go to gym three times a week, focus your efforts on setting a target for this activity. For example, “I will run a six minute kilometer by the end of the year”.  You now have a way to track your progress. What result can you focus your activity on?

2. Have a priority list (for today)

What are you doing today to take yourself forward towards your goals. Many small actions will take you quicker towards your target, rather than one large step. Kick procrastination out through small actions.

3. Timeblock

The most common excuse you hear from people who don’t reach their goals is “I don’t have enough time”. Which is not true. We all have 168 hours a week and we decide how to invest this time. What can you cut out or down on to create more time? Stop watching TV and DVDs during weekdays. Can you use your travel time to create time to learn?  Print out a one month calendar and take a few different colored highlighters and block out time at least a week in advance. When I authored my book this summer, I had to block out “creative time” in my calendar to solely focus on writing, researching and creating ideas.  Other time blocks can include family time, health, client work, learning. You can choose other categories that make sense for you. Timeblock at least one hour per activitiy.

Don’ts

1. Overplan

Unless you are a CEO, time blocking down to every 15minutes may not be necessary.  Just because technology makes this easy to do, doesn’t make it a good idea.  Also, add in some buffer time which are unplanned. This will help you keep on track if you run late on a particular activity.

2. Overuse technology

While we are talking about technology, find a balance. Today smartphones and PDAs have allowed us to create and track every single task. But don’t forget that a piece of paper can be more effective. I post up a calendar on my wall and the three dimensional ability to turn around and see my year at a glance is powerful. Technology can be good to create time awareness. Check out a time tracking tool like My Hours.

One of the hardest habits to break is time’s control over us. Any successful person will tell you that the first step to health and wealth mastery is time mastery. Get time to march to your beat.

Every life change requires a change in how your time is being used. With my coaching clients, I show how to take that step to master your time and to invest it rather than spend it. If you are looking to make a change in your health, wealth and contribution, The Change Catalyst can help you accelerate through the obstacles that lie both within you and around you. Contact The Change Catalyst today for a free initial consultation.




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